Wednesday, February 25, 2009

Virtual Life

The main reason I hate Virginia isn't the stinking cold, or the income tax, or all the harassment before the election. The main thing I hate about Virginia is the not having friends here part.

As most of you know, it takes me a long time to get close to people. Most of my friends now I knew for years before we actually became friends. There are, of course, a few shining exceptions, people I just clicked with automatically. Thank goodness for the internet, so I can keep up with everyone. Between the blog, e-mail, myspace, and facebook I've been able to keep up with everyone who matters. Unfortunately, that's all I seem to have right now.

And the one thing I hate about being a stay at home mom is the lack of contact with the outside world. There are no outlets to meet people. No coworkers to get to know, no classmates to go out to lunch with after lecture. Even at the playground, you might chat for a few moments, but that other mom is focused on her kid (as are you) and most likely already has a life and friends so the stranger in the park isn't a priority for befriending.

And then there' s the women at church. Don't get me wrong, I love church, but when people at church are nice to me, I'm always wondering if they are nice because they're interested in me as a person or if they're being nice because they are supposed to be nice. I don't want to be someone's pity friend. I have wonderful friendship qualities, I'm loyal, I'm funny, I listen well. I am not pity-friend material!

I think I'm going to have to take a class or join a book club or something just to get some adult interaction besides Faiyaz. And with anyone I meet in that kind of setting, if they try to befriend me at least I'll know it's not out of pity.

Other than that, I'm doing great. The new book is chugging along. Anjali is smart and fun. Nadira is growing so fast it makes me want to cry. Soon I'm going to be packing up the 0-3 month sized clothes, she's getting too long for them. It feels like she's growing up faster than Anjali did. I think that's because my time is divided between the two.

4 comments:

Mrs. Blimes said...

dont forget the good ole cell phone! its a great way to keep in touch too!!!

The Miller Family said...

You are SO not pity-friend material!

I've been thinking about joining some type of mommy-and-me group. Hopefully, I'd meet women who want friends, just like I do, but who are likely just as distracted by and focused on their kids as I am :o)

I hope you find some local friends. It's lonely to be by yourself {as redundant as that sounds}. Just don't go forgetting us back home!!!

And p.s. - we miss you too.

Unknown said...

You're on facebook! I'm adding you now!


You can be a virtual member of my amazing book club if you want.

It's funny, but with so many adults around me, I had the desire yesterday to be calm and quiet and just hold a baby!

Dottie! said...

meetup.com is amazing for things like that!

I'M GRADUATING IN 3 MONTHS!!